The Brit.

It has been a while, hasn't it?

For the first time since I left Mike and our life back on the East Coast (almost a year ago now!), I met someone that made me stop and kind of act like a school girl with a bit of a crush.

I hesitate to talk about it too much, and I haven't really told anyone but my two sisters, because who knows - it may turn into absolutely nothing.  But regardless of the result, the fact of the matter is that I felt something again.  (That sounds sooo corny once I type it, but I don't know a lesser way to say it.)

Wow.

I had been conscious of the fact that my heart and my emotions were closed off, and I had been conscious of the fact that I have built a taller wall around myself than ever before.  But until I actually interacted with this man this past week and allowed myself to first- be interested, and then- to accept that the interest was mutual, I had not realized exactly how far I had stepped out of the Emotions Ring.

So like I said, regardless of the outcome, I am grateful to say I have a little crush right now.

And in true girl fashion, now that I've walked all around the edge of the story, I'll actually share how it unfolded.

Back at the end of September, I went to one of my best girlfriend's weddings.  I had a really good time with my other nearest girlfriends and their husbands, and I seriously hardly raised my head to look around at who else was in attendance.  I know, I know, weddings are meant to be great places to meet people, but I was really just in my own world that day.

With the exception of the part of the reception where speeches were being given.  While standing and listening to the speeches, I found myself standing next to a guy that I didn't even glance at (again, in my own world), until I heard him speak.  Hellooo, British accent.  You know we're all weak in the knees for those.

So I turn to the guy, who I guess we can call The Brit.  I turn to The Brit - who is not my physical type generally at all, by the way - and chat him up for a moment.  He chats back, and then to be honest, I don't recall what happened after that.  We went our separate ways, no big deal.  But he did have a charisma about him that I remembered and thought was cool.

Flash forward to last week when I traveled to San Francisco with my girlfriend, Emily, who was the bride at the aforementioned wedding.  She and I were in the city for the week seeing clients, and so we went to dinner together on Halloween night.  As we were in the cab going to the restaurant, she mentioned that The Brit would be joining us.  I had a little tinge of excitement but then internally rolled my eyes at myself - I don't really even know this guy.

Well, The Brit joined us for dinner, and then took us out to a bar in the Marina District for some after-meal cocktails.

Over cocktails, we started in on a conversation about something totally unrelated from anyone at the table, and the flow of topic caused me to say, "No, I think that's bullshit.  I don't care if it's 2012, women should not have to be the aggressors.  Men should still have to make the first move."  To which The Brit replied quickly (in his nice British accent of course), "Ahright then, I think you're really hot."

I was so flustered, I forced myself to choke down my sip of wine, and I'm sure my face turned as red as my Zinfandel.

Anyways, long story short, Emily wanted to go home, so we dropped her off at the hotel, and The Brit and I continued out.  We chatted and kissed until 3 in the morning (wayyy past my bedtime!), and we've been sporadically texting/facebook/instagram flirting which feels both juvenile and kind of fun.

He lives in San Francisco, so I don't know that this will go anywhere at all, but I am actually interested to the point that I keep debating when is "right" to text him back and whatnot.

So lame, but I gotta say that it feels nice to be semi-back into the game.  

Even if I do mildly feel like I'm acting like a 14 year old.

On love + dating.

Look at me going another month without a post. 

My cousin made a quick stop in LA last night on her way from Miami to Hong Kong (it's a hard life), + within three minutes of me picking her up, she asked why I hadn't updated Lacey in the Making in a while.  And let me tell ya girls, I have a lot of LITM-worthy writing to do.  So here goes:

The hardest thing in life for me is to believe in life-long love.  It's not an exaggeration.  I've felt this way since I was a teenager and first began really pondering the concept of love.  I mean, I came from a broken home (I don't have one memory in my life of my parents kissing or embracing), + although I believed I was in love at the times of my past three serious relationships, the last of those two both ended with me in an emotional tailspin because the ex-manfriends were, in the end, complete a-holes.  (If you need proof of this, please read through the posts that began this little secret blog, which detailed the ending of my relationship with NY boyfriend.)

So with that said, + with you all having a grasp on my level of bitterness after The Great Breakup of 2011, I joined an online dating site once I got back here to LA.  I'm aware that it's still considered la lame in some areas to do such a thing, but I did it.  I was trying to convince myself that there was a man out there who was good and funny and strong and all the other fantastic qualities that I have added over the years onto my "He Must Have" list.

So a quick synopsis of the four dates I've ended up going on over the past two months:

Date #1:  I met him at a cute outdoor wine bar in Los Feliz area of LA.  Cool area, cool vibe.  This guy + I had the same birthday (but seven years different), + he seemed confident and cool from our messaging back and forth.  Forty-five minutes into the date, he looked at his phone and said, "Yah, I have to get up at 5 tomorrow for a call with the East Coast."  I hadn't even finished my first glass of wine yet.  So cool as a cucumber, I responded: "Sure, well whenever you need to leave, just let me know."  "Okay," he said, as he began to put his jacket back on.  Me: "Oh.  So that means now?"  And that was that.  He texted me the next day that he was sorry, but that he had been seeing someone else and he wanted to see where it goes.  I didn't believe that story obviously, and would've preferred if he wasn't into me, he just had said that.

Date #2:  Basically the exact same thing as Date #1, but the text message the next morning was more straightforward: that he didn't feel a chemistry, but that he thought I was a really fun and super sweet girl and he'd be interested in friendship.

Date #3:  Tall, dark, + handsome.  Seemed successful.  Seven years older than me.  All was good.  Then between first date and the second date we had planned, he went out of town for the weekend.  And texted me that weekend asking me for a picture for his viewing pleasure.  The whole conversation was suggestive, and I knew what he meant.  I told him that he was barking up the wrong tree and that because his question was weird and made me uncomfortable, I was canceling our second date.

Date #4:  This one takes the absolute cake.  There are way too many ridiculous details on this one, so I'll give you the highlights.

-He brought me flowers.  Very nice.  What was not nice is that before the end of the date, he instructed me to save two of the flowers and hang them upside down so that we would always have a token from the first flowers he ever gave me.

-He kept on about, "You know what I love about how we communicate?" 

-He asked, "So do you intend to take your future husband's name? *cough cough* Strong German names are great...just saying."  (Obviously his surname was German.)

-"I mean, if you don't love babies, we should just stop talking right now." (Ahhhhh)

-"So all these road trips that you take, are you allowed to bring along significant others? So I could call you and say, 'Hey babe, I have a week off, let me come meet you somewhere!'"

-"So you're going out of town next week.  What is your daily schedule?  Because you'll be in another state, I will obviously want to talk to you on the phone."

-"What are you doing for Memorial Day?  My brothers and I always do a camping trip and I want you to come."


So wowza, that's what has been happening lately in the dating realm over here.  And it's all left me wondering where the heck the happy medium is.  Oh, and in case you were wondering, NO, I no longer am participating in the online dating world.  After all those duds, I just need a breather from men in general for a minute.  Yeesh.

Dos, + The Aussie.

ALRIGHTY...I had mentioned in the previous post that Dos was paying attention without being too much.  My how things can change.  As far as I'm concerned, I have completely lost interest in him, but I'm trying to gently let him know, because he is a nice guy.  He's so darn negative though.  Every day is "eh" or "blah" and weekends are "mediocre".  I'm not interested in that sort of negativity.  I've had to carry a man before emotionally, and I am 1000% NOT interested in constantly pushing someone toward happiness.  No ma'am, not this gal.

So I've backed off A TON in communication, which per normal human nature, has made Dos cling.  Also not attractive.  I'm currently waiting for the moment that feels appropriate in which to tell him why I no longer intend to go out on dates with him.  A little bit tricky since he is at my brother-in-law's house semi-regularly.

In other news, ladies...I met and had a romantic cross country crush affair with an Australian on my travels this month.  Mhm.

I met The Australian in Dallas a couple of weeks ago.  I was walking a trade show to decide if I wanted to show my brand there, and I passed a handsome, sort of Gerard Butler looking man at his booth.  He made eye contact, we both smiled.  I kept walking, and at the end decided to go back and ask him a few questions about how he liked the show.  Zero ulterior motive.

And then he spoke.  In his Aussie accent.  Oh mama!  We exchanged business cards, and I thanked him for his advice, and that was that. 

Then I ran into him at the end of the day in the elevator.  We stood for a good 10 minutes and chatted, and he told me he was also headed to New York right after Dallas and that he'd like to take me for drinks.  I'm not one to turn down free beverages from hot foreigners, so we made plans.  And I was so busy that I didn't follow up once.  He did all of the outreach, which was how it should be. 

We went out that following Monday in New York for drinks.  We met at 930 and stayed at the bar til 2, where we parted ways.  Great conversation, laughed the whole time.  The next day, I was exhausted, as was he.  He texted and I replied that my pjs and trash tv were calling my name.  He replied that we should have a pajama party.  The fact that we both were staying in hotels made it seem a little weird, but hey - when in New York, you roll with it.  So I said sure, and invited him to mine.  He came over and we joked and chatted until again around 2 am until he finally started a pillow fight and kissed me.  And we kissed (kissed only!  Unfortunately I am a good girl with a huge guilt complex!) until like 430 in the morning, when we finally fell asleep.  He escorted me to work the next day, dropping me with a smile and a farewell smooch. 

And then he flew home to Melbourne this weekend.  BUT he comes back to The States in a couple of days for the big Fashion Trade Show we have in Vegas.  So we will once again be in the same city.  I've made no efforts to reach out to him, so I am just doing nothing.  I've decided I'm playing the feminine card for a while, across the board.  So if he reaches out this week in Vegas, then fantastic!  If not, well hey - I'd never made out with and had an all-night cuddle sesh with an Australian before.  :)

And then, not to confuse you too much, but I have a date tonight.  I'll fill you in on him post-date.  Seems like Lacey in the Making is getting much more fun though now that I'm single!  At least I think so :)

xoxo

Single life in LA thus far.

It's been over a month since I posted here on LITM... I just reread my last post detailing how the end of Mike and me ended up going down and -ouch- it hurt to relive it.  SO - moving on past that jerkface and his hurtful memory and into sharing with you guys what the past month has been like as a single lady on the West Coast...

Let's see - I went on the date that I mentioned in the last post.  He was a nice guy - tall, successful, a gentleman.  We went on a second date also, but by the second date I determined that as nice as he was, there was no attraction.  And let's be honest, it had not been but a few weeks since Mike + I had officially ended things, so I don't know that I was mentally in the strongest of places to really put my head into being interested in someone.

Then enter the day before New Year's Eve.  My older sister and I went to her husband, Albert's office so that I could get my back adjusted (he's a chiropractor).  As I was leaving, Albert mentioned - "Hey Lace, what are you up to tonight?  You should come over to watch the fight.  I'm having a couple of guys over, and there's actually one that I think you should meet.  His name's Albert also...he's a cool kid."  My brother-in-law just turned 40 this month, so he thinks everyone is a "kid" anymore. 

I considered the idea and finally decided, what the heck.  I was still in my yoga clothes from earlier in the day (there wasn't time to go change), but I headed over to my sister's place in time for the fight. 

To continue the story without confusion, we'll call the second Albert "Dos".  (Both Alberts are Mexican, so that's why my sister dubbed him with a nickname in Spanish...)

So a little bit after I arrived, Dos got to the house.  It turns out that he's been friends with Laura + Albert for a few years now, since I moved to NY practically, but I'd never met him at any of their get-togethers or anything until then.  My brother-in-law was right though, and Dos and I totally hit it off.  Turns out he's not the "kid" Albert described him as - he's 30, in banking, going to school full-time while working full-time, was a Marine and worked as a paralegal for JAG when he was in the service (he's been out for about 8 years), and he's certified to be an EMT...kind of well-rounded, especially when you compare him to Mike!  I was impressed.

So that was the night before New Year's Eve.  We then ended up all hanging out at a wine bar in the Silverlake neighborhood to ring in NYE (no NYE kiss, in case you wondered), and then he took me to lunch on New Year's Day (which then ended with a goodbye smooch, in case you wondered:)).  After lunch, we drove around and chatted until it was time for me to get home to get ready for my other sister's birthday dinner.

Then of course, I left LA to head to NY for 2 weeks for work, but he texted every day, and we spoke on the phone a couple of the nights.  Nice + slow....how I like it.  But he's paying quite the adequate amount of attention without being too much.  

This past week when I was back in LA, he took me out three different times...  All a good time, all ending with us talking on the couch until 3 in the morning.  

I am quite interested in him, but I am so cautious right now.  The repercussions of dealing with Mike have my guard up and have me keeping Dos at a distance at the moment.  I don't think it's a bad thing at all.  Who knows if it will turn out to be something special or not, but if it's meant to be that, then it will.  And I can take my dear, sweet time getting there.  

So that's that...a nice little update on the dating situation.  I hope to keep updating LITM more regularly than I have in the past month.  With the holidays having passed and then jumping right into the most heinous part of the work year (the first few weeks of January), everything got quite crazy for me, and blogging on both LITM + LITC totally fell to the wayside.  Here's to keeping up with it all a little better as the weeks go on :)

xoxo