How Mike proved himself to be a royal jerkface in the end.

If you've been following LITC or my twitter/facebook, you are aware that some pretty quick decisions were made in the past week, and I have fast forwarded my move to Los Angeles.  Instead of packing up everything I own, shipping my car, and putting in that change of address in mid-January, I am already here.  I'm camped out at my momma's for the holidays, and then I literally will be "home" in LA for about three days in January because of my crazy work travel schedule, so I am not going to be solidifying my new apartment situation until February 1. 

So just to keep track of my whereabouts, I will be in New York from Dec 27 - Jan 13, Los Angeles from Jan 14 - 16, and Dallas from Jan 17 - 31.  Phew.  Hotel living and bed hopping will be my expertises for the next few weeks.

I still have my apartment in Connecticut with Mike, and I am still paying rent on it, but I refuse to return to it.  I packed up everything I own into my Nissan Rogue last weekend, and I hopped on a flight Monday evening, never to return to that home.  I hired a trucking company to pick up Yogi the Roguey and put him on a car carrier and drive him out to California for me.  He should be here by this coming Friday - woohoo! 

So what happened to catapult the pending move into an immediate must-do-now situation...  Mike + I had talked a lot about our break up and had made it clear that we were breaking up because he was unable to maintain responsibility over his anxiety, which was just the icing on the cake on top of all of the other hurtful situations that happened, that I have shared with you here.

All was fine until last Thursday (a little over a week ago).  He was going to meet a couple of clients for drinks at a bar right down the street (so he walked), and we were planning on having dinner at home once he was back.  He had even said before he left that he'd walk his dog before bed and had asked me to DVR Law + Order so we could watch it together after dinner.  Well, one of the clients that he was going out with, Karen, is someone that I had met multiple times over the last year and a half.  She lives about two blocks away from us, and everytime I met her, I thought she was super brash, and that she was only being nice to me because she was super into Mike.  This gal, by the way, is 33, and Mike is 26.  Not that age really has anything to do with it, I just personally prefer to always date older than myself. 

So around 9 pm, Mike called me with Karen on speakerphone asking me to google a karaoke place for them to go to.  I didn't say anything, but was a bit put off that he was calling me asking me this, while I was waiting for him at home before I had dinner.  She was on the phone with him, and she called out, "Lacey!  Come out!  We wouldn't have invited Mike for drinks at all had we known you wouldn't be here - we want to see you!"  I rolled my eyes and almost snorted on my side of the phone, because like I said, it is embarrassingly obvious that she has a thing for Mike and that she has always just tried to be nice to me as a way to be buddy-buddy with him.

By 1130, I was pissed.  I had taken his dog out for him, I went ahead and ate dinner, crawled into bed, and watched the Law + Order.  I was so mad that by that time, I had put a pillow on the couch for him, to make sure that he knew I was mad, and to get the point across when he walked in the door that he was not permitted to sleep in the bed that night.  (We had still been sharing the bed after the breakup, but with the dog and pillows between us, of course.) 

I was awake all night.  2 AM came, which meant it was last call.  I knew that if he didn't come home within the next half hour that he wouldn't be coming home and that he had gone home with Karen.  Sure enough, I watched the clock turn from 3 AM to 5 AM and on.  When the sun started coming up, my nerves climbed even higher because I knew he'd be home soon, since he had to leave the apartment by about 730 to get to work on time.  When 8 AM rolled around and I hadn't seen him, I actually started to become concerned.  What if he had had an anxiety attack and wound up in the hospital?  He was out drinking, and I know he doesn't do well when he gets drunk.  What if he was hit by a car walking home?  I started to worry.  By 830 AM, I had called him about twenty times.  When he didn't answer or read any of his BBMs, I called the Emergency Room.  And the Police Station.  Neither of which had seen Mike.  I then thought, if anything happened, he would have either called me, his dad, or his best friend Tara (who happens to be his boss).  So I reached out to both his father and Tara, neither of which had heard from him.  So I sucked it up and I texted Karen, whose number I had from one of our weird run-ins over the past year and a half.  I said to her that I didn't care at this point if he was with her, but that his family and I were all worried and were scared he may be hurt.  She didn't answer.  So fifteen minutes later, I called her phone.  She didn't answer, but lo and behold, the ringing of her phone is what woke him up. 

He had done what to me was the unthinkable.  While still sharing a roof and promising each other that we would be completely respectful toward one another, and while he knew full well that I was waiting at home for him to get back for dinner and to take care of his responsibilities, he went home and slept with some girl that we have both made fun of for being gross and super manly before.  He knows me well enough that he knew I wouldn't sleep all night if he didn't come home, and he knew that I am smart enough to know that he was two blocks away having sex with another girl.  Ten days after we had broken up and he swore that he would love me forever.  Listen, I know we were broken up, I get that.  At the end of the day, I don't care if he is seeing other people - honestly I don't, because he has worn away and chipped down my feelings so harshly over the past few months, that I actually breathed a sigh of relief once I finally broke it off with him.  But to do it in a way that it was like shoving it in my face, and in a way that caused me worry and upset is cruel.

He was livid at me that I had called his dad and his boss.  I didn't care.  When they called me back shortly after I discovered where he was for sure, I did not lie to them.  I told his father that he had gone home with another woman.  His father's breath was taken away from him.  He couldn't fathom why Mike would do something so mean and hurtful and thoughtless to me, especially when I had taken such amazing care of him over the past year and a half (his dad's words, not mine).  Tara asked if I had found him at Karen's house, and I didn't lie to her either.  I told her yes.  She was appalled for me.  She even had me over for dinner on Saturday night to be able to say farewell to her and her kids (who I have built a fun relationship with).  When I was over for dinner, she disclosed to me that Mike has been doing a completely sub-par job at work for months now.  She even revealed to me that at one of their major functions last month, that Mike got drunk and was falling and slurring in front of donors (he works for a non-profit).  She even disclosed that he left the function without her knowledge and drove home drunk.  I couldn't believe his idiocy and that he was able to hide the truth of all of that from me.  (I was in Virginia for a girl's weekend that weekend.)

That morning when he got home, I made him get out of our home and I told him he was not allowed to return until after I was gone.  That was Friday.  I spent the weekend packing and getting my things in order, and I hopped on a flight Monday night to LA, and here I am.

Pretty unreal, right?

I've got more to share with you later, including that I went on a date this week here in LA!  And it was actually a really GOOD date!  I'll share that soon....

As always, thank you for all of your support, ladies.  xoxo