I wear my emotions on my sleeve.
Mike could tell that something is off with me, ever since our Saturday afternoon argument. He brought it up a couple of hours ago, and we sat down on the bed and had a super level conversation. I told him that I love him, but I have lost so much confidence in us. He agreed - he feels the same. We both know we love each other immensely and that we are best friends, but we were actually able to voice out loud that we may not be the best thing for each other anymore.
God, does that hurt to acknowledge to each other.
He's agreed to give me space this week, and he is packing a bag tonight so that when he leaves for work in the morning, he will stay at his friend's lake house until Friday.
I called my mom and spoke to her for an entire hour while she was at work, her just listening to me sobbing. My heart is breaking, but I am simultaneously feeling some relief. Albeit small, it is still relief.
Love really effing hurts sometimes, girls.
God, does that hurt to acknowledge to each other.
He's agreed to give me space this week, and he is packing a bag tonight so that when he leaves for work in the morning, he will stay at his friend's lake house until Friday.
I called my mom and spoke to her for an entire hour while she was at work, her just listening to me sobbing. My heart is breaking, but I am simultaneously feeling some relief. Albeit small, it is still relief.
Love really effing hurts sometimes, girls.
3 comments:
:( Although I am extremely sad for you and my heart is breaking for both of you, maybe this time apart will be a good thing. I wish I could give you a hug right now :( I'm glad that you two were able to have a normal, level conversation. That's what the medication allows him to do-not get angry, upset, or anxious about it, but to talk in a level manner where he gets his point across and is easily able to listen to your point of view.
I'm praying and crossing my fingers that he is able to see clearly this week what he needs to do. Love, just remember you have been doing everything you possibly can to try and make it work. It takes two to tango, and you can only beg/plead/try and reason so much for the other person to be there with both feet in the ring.
Just know that I'm only a phone call/text away if you need ANYTHING! Love you bunches :)
My heart hurts for you girl. Love really does effing hurt sometimes. I am glad you and Mike were able to talk over the weekend; getting the chance to voice what you've been keeping inside, will hopefully help him see what he needs to do. This time apart will undoubtedly be hard, but I hope it will help you both realize what each of you need.
Sending you hugs from Iowa :)
I'm so sorry girl, I swear a mutual breakup is thehardest thing. That's what Chris & I had to go through, we just knew it wasn't working. But I'm so proud of you for finally standing up and realizing that the situation was toxic (I know, sounds harsh) and pulling yourself away from it, and I'm glad he understands/agrees... who knows what will happen in the future but it sounds like you two are right, right now you just need to be yourselves, not TOGETHER
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