I just wrote the following in an email to my dear friend, Alix, and I decided to share this here as well.
Things here are...good. Is that possible? I feel like people will think I'm an idiot if I take Mike back. Maybe I feel like I'll be the one thinking I'm an idiot. I don't know. He's making a million efforts, and really trying hard. We'd been talking before all of this exploded about him coming to LA with me. That was when there was no definite date on it. When everything hit the fan, I set the timeline for MYSELF in place: try to head back at the New Year. Now if things work out with us, I've also put this timeline on him, without his input. I don't feel guilty for it too much, because I had to do what I had to do, for me. But I do know that it's a huge stresser on him. He wants to be with me, he doesn't want us to be apart. And that means then that he has to be prepared to leave everything he's ever known his whole life (he's only lived in New England ever), to depart on a cross-country question mark, hoping that it will all work out. Maybe that's indirectly his karma punishment for the mistakes he's made. Do you think I'm a fool?
Things here are...good. Is that possible? I feel like people will think I'm an idiot if I take Mike back. Maybe I feel like I'll be the one thinking I'm an idiot. I don't know. He's making a million efforts, and really trying hard. We'd been talking before all of this exploded about him coming to LA with me. That was when there was no definite date on it. When everything hit the fan, I set the timeline for MYSELF in place: try to head back at the New Year. Now if things work out with us, I've also put this timeline on him, without his input. I don't feel guilty for it too much, because I had to do what I had to do, for me. But I do know that it's a huge stresser on him. He wants to be with me, he doesn't want us to be apart. And that means then that he has to be prepared to leave everything he's ever known his whole life (he's only lived in New England ever), to depart on a cross-country question mark, hoping that it will all work out. Maybe that's indirectly his karma punishment for the mistakes he's made. Do you think I'm a fool?
1 comment:
I feel like (again just my opinion, take it with a grain of salt... Is that even the saying? It's kind of dumb one ... FOCUS! anyways) I feel like if you do decide that M goes west with you... That it's after you go west by yourself. Maybe a few months or something?
Idk just a thought. Absence makes the heart grow fonder? And gives minds time to clear?
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